Academic Stress
Gifted kids learn quickly. That means that they can pick up new concepts after one or two repetitions. Average children need ten to twelve repetitions. That means that gifted kids are sitting through anywhere from eight to eleven unnecessary repetitions. Even bright children need at least five repetitions, so even in a roomful of nothing but bright children, the gifted child will be sitting through some unnecessary repetitions.However, being able to grasp concepts quickly is just part of the problem. Another part of the problem is that many gifted children start the school year, especially in the early grades already knowing a majority of the information that will be taught. That means that they don’t need any repetitions because they already know the material. For example, a five-year-old might enter kindergarten already knowing how to read, yet that child will have to sit in class and learn about the “letter of the day.” He or she will have to engage in all the activities that are supposed to help children learn the letters and the sounds they represent, activities meant to get students ready to learn to read.
Children who already know the material being taught or who pick new material up quickly can get bored (although parents should avoid using the word “bored” when ). Trying to sit still and pay attention under those circumstances can be quite stressful. While we might say that children should learn to be patient and to sit still, the reality is that few of us could sit still after hours of being bored. Some adults can’t tolerate being bored for two hours and will leave in the middle of a boring movie rather than sit through to the end. Yet many adults expect children to accept being bored not for two hours, but for sometimes up to six hours a day. And not just one day, but five days a week. And not just one week, but for the thirty-six weeks of the school year.
Giving Kids a Break FOR Learning
The lack of intellectual stimulation and challenge can take its toll on gifted kids. They can lose the motivation to learn. Parents often notice the sparkle in their child’s eyes begin to fade. These children with so much potential can become underachievers, and once a pattern of underachievement sets in, it is hard to reverse.Perhaps worse than the effect on achievement, the lack of intellectual stimulation and challenge can affect gifted kids emotionally. They can become frustrated, angry and even depressed. They can suffer from psychosomatic illnesses, a common one being a stomach ache. For some parents getting their children ready for school in the morning can be a heartbreaking battle since parents know they are sending their children off for another day of monotony, while their children are crying and complaining of various physical ailments.
Under these circumstances, parents might consider giving their child a “Mental Health Day.” That is a day on which the child is allowed to stay home from school. These days should not be handed out lightly. That is, parents should not allow their child to stay home every time the child is feeling stress at school. All children get stressed in school. However, most parents of gifted kids recognize the moments when the stress gets to be too much and their children are beginning to suffer physically and emotionally, not just academically.
Mental Health Days are not days on which children escape from the pressures of learning. On the contrary. They are days on which gifted kids are given an opportunity to learn more. They don’t have to sit in a room waiting for the other kids to catch up. They can unfurl their wings and fly. Parents who want to give their child a Mental Health Day should be prepared to spend time with their child. It’s not a day for sitting idly in front of a television.
Instead, it is a day for visiting a museum or for going to the library. It is a day for working on projects near and dear to the child’s heart, projects that can’t be done in school. It is a day on which a child can explore a topic he or she is passionate about. If both parents work, parents should make plans in advance for a sitter who would be available during the day and who would be willing to take the child on trips or work with a child on projects.
Mental Health Days are not just for young children. I knew a high school girl who, in the early 1960’s, before computers made mass letter writing a simple process, was interested in learning about segregation and its effect on education. When she had the opportunity to stay home from school, she typed, on a typewriter, fifty letters to the education department of each state in the U.S. asking them about segregation in their schools.
